I am filled with excitement to think that in just 2 days we will be finding out the sex of the little bundle of joy that I am carrying in my uterus. But at the same time I am cautiously upset. I have 3 wonderful little girls that I love and adore with all my heart, and yes while I have a son that I will always love even if he can't be here on earth with us, I want that chance to have another son, I want to raise a little boy. I know I shouldn't be upset, I shouldn't be selfish because there are families and women out there that can't even have children and I have been blessed with what will soon be 4 live children. I also do not hold a grudge against god for taking my little boy away from me, I know he had his reasons and I respect that but I still would like to have that chance to have a little boy to raise. I know that no matter what we are having I will love this child the same as I love my other 4. I don't want to come off as being greedy at what I have I know I am blessed to have the children that I have, and I feel awful for the families who try so hard to have children and can't. I can't help feel the way I feel I just want to have a little boy and I hope on Monday when I go in for my Ultrasound the technician tells me that we will be expecting a boy. But even if he or she doesn't say its a boy, I may be upset at first but I know that I will be so happy, excited and in love as soon as I see that precious little miracle in person.
Thanks for listening.....
Have a Great Weekend!
Catrina
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